Not every woman has the audacity to discuss sex much more claim to be a professional in the act. But Tobi Kukoyi, a certified sex and beauty therapist, does both and much more. She is the brain behind the brand, “My Aphrodisiac”, an offshoot of Goldrush Beauty Concept. Her sudden rise and success in the Aphrodisiac business lends credence to the sex therapist’s high level of professionalism. In this interview with MARY NNAH, she bares it all while dispelling the myth surrounding the use of Kayanmata, a word originating from the Northern part of Nigeria, which refers to herbs or potions that act as sex or love enhancers
Tell us a bit about yourself and the journey into selling sex enhancement herbs xx to women, especially?
I am from Ondo state, Mahin to be precise, in Ilaje local government area. I grew up in Ijebu Ode, Ogun state, married to an Ijebu man. Marriage brought me to Lagos State, where I currently reside. I am the last of seven children. My dad was an Anglican priest and my mum is an Associate Professor in the university. I had my primary education at Adeola Odutola Elementary School, Ijebu Ode; secondary at FGC Odogbolu, Ogun State; and my tertiary education at Olabisi Onabanjo University Ago Iwoye, Ogun State, where I studied Mass Communication. As a student, I was an entrepreneur, opened a nail studio in school and I was selling cosmetics and gold jewelry. I graduated in 2006 and decided to take my beauty business seriously. I took some professional courses in skincare, makeup and weight management, home and abroad.
With all the knowledge I acquired, I took my beauty career to a pro level in 2008, got a structured plan and finally registered the business with Corporate Affairs Commission in 2010 as Goldrush Beauty Concept, which is now an umbrella company for my businesses. In the course of my career, I have had more female clients than male, and we get to share personal experiences based on trust, most on sexuality and how it affects relationships, and my clients commend me of always giving the best advice.
Unlike many women, I never had issues with my sexuality until 2012 after I had my first child, I became really frigid and sex was a problem for me. I started conducting research on my issue and found out about some fruits and vegetables that I could mix to help my sexual problems. I started mixing and drinking, alas! I got my groove back; this was my first encounter with aphrodisiacs. I began making great recipes myself to help boost my libido.
How long have you been in Aphrodisiac business?
Like I said, from my previous experience I knew exactly what to do. In early 2018, during my second pregnancy, I discovered that we had herbs locally made here in Nigeria that could help with sexuality. I immediately started my research which led me to the North and I got introduced to ‘Kayanmata’, which means a woman’s thing in Hausa, fell in love with the ones I used and I couldn’t help but share with friends. They also used it and gave great testimonies.
At this point sexuality was beginning to look like a passion for me, seeing the joy and satisfaction in the eyes of my friends. It would definitely be a good way for me to help others with sexual needs and my experience, positive testimonials from friends, would make this easy to sell.
The first thing that I did was to understudy the business so I could understand it properly. I researched about those already in the business, and was so glad to see women as bold as myself, doing well in the business. I finally decided to become a distributor to one of the best in the game, Tomiwa Akinola of Miwa Signature Palace, it was an awesome experience. During this period, I also did an online course on Sex Therapy, so I could be well grounded. After I had my baby, I started working on my brand, Mydsiac, a short form for ‘My Aphrodisiac’. The brand was fully launched in August 2018, and is geared towards using herbs and organic products to help both men and women achieve the best in sex and beauty.
Would you consider the business to be an untapped goldmine in the country?
It is a goldmine that’s not fully tapped. Many people are already in the business, but just a few understand the core motives of the business. Now that more and more people are becoming free to express their sexuality issues, this industry is going to get even larger than we can imagine.
You have a sound knowledge and application of Kayanmata herbs, can you expound on its usefulness and importance in sex therapy?
The usefulness of Kayanmata cannot be overemphasized, because everyone at a point in life will need an aphrodisiac. As we grow, our hormones begin to malfunction due to the lifestyle we live-diet, stress, pregnancy, responsibilities and health issues affects the libido, which results in poor or low sexual performance. I gave example of how childbirth affected my sexuality, it was a serious issue, I was completely disconnected from my vagina, I didn’t have sex for six months straight, the urge for it wasn’t there at all, and because I gave birth through cesarean section, my husband didn’t want to push, he wanted me to be ready. I had to use aphrodisiacs to correct my hormones, before I could be active again, and I have helped thousands of cases like mine achieve the same result.
Are there side effects of using Kayanmata herbs?
Kayanmata is from nature, they are herbs, roots, fruits and vegetables, and they have absolutely no negative effect. Like I mentioned earlier, I mix some of the products myself, and ensure proper hygiene. The ones sourced from the North, go through heating process to kill any form of bacteria during transportation.
How different or similar are Kayanmata based products from regular so called energy drinks?
Kayanmata is purely organic with no chemical additives, they’re like food, you can’t overdose on them.
What challenges have you faced in the Aphrodisiac business?
My major challenge is acceptance since many people say kayanmata is jazz or fetish. Some don’t want to associate with you, either because of their belief or they don’t want anyone labeling them as ‘fetish’
Most of the time we have to package the products to look like fancy cosmetics or bottled soda, to be acceptable. On my social media pages, clients are too shy to follow, like or comment while some hide under their business page or an unknown account. Like I said earlier, more and more people are becoming aware, and gradually the mindset will change.
We sell some spiritual mantles too, which unavoidably goes with the business, these are prayer mantles for favours and attraction because some people complain that they have lost their relationship to another or don’t have any relationship at all, so these mantles are used to pray for what you want.
What stands your brand out from other competitors?
What stands me out is my customer relationship skills. I personally respond to my clients either through chats or calls, because to me this business is more personal, and people need to feel your presence before they can be comfortable sharing their personal life with you. I can delegate processing of orders and delivery, but I never joke with production and customer’s one on one sessions. It can be overwhelming at times, because I chat with averagely 50 people on a daily basis. I don’t move around much, so it’s easy for me to be on the phone responding to clients all day, and my clients love me for it. I make women queens in their homes and in their relationships, and I make men dragons in bed. I am a mother of queens and dragons! You can call me Khaleesi.
Which of your products are typically in high demand from customers?
My best seller is the Vjay knots, it’s a sex sweetener, boosts the libido to make a woman very wet and helps her orgasm well, also the attraction oils, breakthrough kit and favour soap, they sell out all the time. I recently launched a figurine for wealth, called The Money Tree, this also immediately joined the list of top selling products, and it’s always sold out.
What level of engagement do you undertake to ensure products are safe for use?
I ensure I handle the production myself under good hygienic conditions. I produce weekly so they don’t stay too long on the shelf, and I monitor packaging. All my outsourced items go through re-heat, so we’re sure to kill any bacteria or germs that may cause infection.
What advice do you offer customers who might want to indulge in excessive use of same?
Kayanmata is super effective, a little of it goes a long way, and consistent use of it will correct your system, so there’s no need to over use it. As much as there’s no overdose, remember too much of anything isn’t good either, so use when necessary and as instructed.